Monday, December 14, 2009

75 Days: Get to know us!

Because we are doing a private adoption, all of the leg work is up to us! I found this questionnaire while researching how agencies work with birth parents and thought it had some very good questions in it that should be addressed.

1.) Names
Neal and Carrie

2.) Ages
We were both born in 1979, so we are 30 at the time of this post.

3.) What are your religions?
Neal was raised Catholic but doesn't practice. I was never raised any particular religion but am spiritual. We both consider ourselves Christians and plan on allowing our children to explore and find their own beliefs.

4.) What are your professions?
Neal is an electrician for a manufacturing plant. Before that he was in the Navy where he worked on submarines.

I have always wanted to be a stay-at-home mom and am thrilled that I am able to do so now. I am loving it so much! I also became a Shaklee distributor, after falling in love with their Get Clean line of products. (Green, cheap and they work amazingly well!) I've had different jobs over the years - at a newspaper, as a caterer, a cook/deckhand on a schooner in Maine one summer, a call counselor for a non-profit agency who helped cancer patients pay their medical bills, among others - but ultimately just wanted to be a stay-at-home mom.

5.) Do you have any other children?
Yes. We have one biological son, Kasen.

6.) If you can have biological children, why do you want to adopt?
We want to adopt becuase we tried for three years to get pregnant with Kasen and were finally successful with IVF. The process was emotionally and physically difficult and we don't want to go through it again. Also, the pregnancy was easy for me at first, but towards the end I started having blood pressure issues. During delivery, I hemorrhaged and ended with a prolapsed uterus.

7.) How do your family and friends feel about them adopting children?
Everyone is very supportive and excited about it!

8.) What kind of adoption are you looking for? (open, semi open, closed)
We are willing to send pictures and updates about the baby, but are open to discussing other situations as well!

9.) How do you feel about my friends and family being involved in my decision making?
We think your friends and family should be involved as far as helping you to see all sides of the situation; but ultimately, the decision is yours.

10.) Do you have any pets?
Yes. We have one black lab, Max, who is an amazing dog. He's the best dog I've ever personally known and everyone adores him. I counted once and he knows probably about 100 words and phrases. I should post that list here...

We also have four cats. Mollie is 12 - I got her after the death of my fiance and Neal fell in love with her when we moved in together. Siren is 3 - we found her when she was 2-weeks-old and raised her by hand. Lily and Dexter are 1. We fostered litters of kittens for awhile and kept them from the last litter we had because we fell in love and just couldn't part with them.

11.) What kind of schools do you plan to use for the child?
We don't know for sure yet but value education very much. We hope to instill a love of learning in our children that will let them follow all of their interests as far as they want to!

The area we live in has tons of great resources like museums, science centers, arboretums, etc., and we plan on taking advantage of all of them!

12.) How did you meet?
My best friend of 25 years introduced us after her husband started working with Neal in the Navy.

13.) How long did you date before you were married?
A little over a year and a half.

14.) How long have you been married?
4 years (October 2005)

15.) What number marriage is this for each of you?
First for both.

16.) Are there any diseases that run in your families?
High blood pressure on Neal's side. My brother died of an undiagnosed heart condition at age 20, but we don't know if it was congenital or not. I have had tests and everything came back normal for me.

17.) Are there any mental problems that run in your families?
Besides depression due to life events, not that we are aware of.

18.) Are you willing to financially procure for me during the duration of my pregnancy?
Yes, but under Ohio law, only the following can be paid: medical expenses, counseling, attorney fees and court costs.

19.) How big are your extended families?
Neal has three younger siblings. Cheri, 29, lives in Nebraska and is teaching at a college. Brent, 27, is married to Katie, and is living in Missouri while he goes to medical school. Nick, 21, goes to college in Nebraska. His parents, Rich and Colleen, also live in Nebraska. His dad works for a government agency and his mom works as a cook for a local high school. He also has aunts/uncles/cousins who all live in or near Nebraska.

My parents, Dave and Debbie, live in Newark. My dad retired last year from a plant and they own rental properties. I had a brother who passed away in 1995. I have many aunts/uncles/cousins who all live in this area.

20.) What do you do for holidays?
Some years we fly to Nebraska to be with Neal's family for either Thanksgiving or Christmas or they come out here. Whichever holiday we don't spend with them, we spend with my extended family. We also regularly visit my family on just about every other government holiday for cookouts.

21.) What are your hobbies?
Neal is big into building things... he is an engineer at heart. He does construction, gardening, landscaping, electrical work, computers... the list goes on. He is constantly surprising me with the skills that he has. If he doesn't know how something works, he will figure it out and usually make it better!

I enjoy reading, blogging, scrapbooking and am have recently started (oddly) enjoying working out at the gym.

22.) How much contact do you want before the child is born?
We would love the opportunity to get to know you well so that you would feel very much at ease with us and confident in your decision to place your child with us if you choose to do so.

23.) Do you want to be in the delivery room with me when the baby is born?
If you are comfortable with this, we would love the opportunity - but if not, that's fine, too! Whatever you want.

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